Mike
Mark
Marvelous Mark
Phil Slackmeyer
Henry Kissinger
Hank
Bernie
Calvin
Rufus
Thor
B.D.'s dad
Mike's mom
Hubert Humphrey
Mr. Humphrey
Dick Cavett
Widow Doonesbury
Zonker's mom
Zonker's dad
Mr. Harris
Phred
Uncle Henry
Joanie
Clinton Caucus
Phred's mother
Venerable Mom
Yuri Yetsky
Norma Jean
Skip Willis
Dan Rather
Alice
Jeb Magruder
Howie
Ellie
Jeanie
Jim Andrews
Roland Hedley
Dick Davenport
Lacey Davenport
Duke
Yawn Wenner
Ginny Slade
Ben
Kim
Nate Harris
Amy Harris
Samantha
Sam
Jim Thudpucker
Jimmy Thudpucker
Andy Lippincott
Rick Redfern
Jen Thudpucker
Miles Potash
Dr. Dan Asher
Zeke
J.J.
JJ
John Anderson
Joanie's mom
Jeremy
Jonah
Sid Kibbitz
Jeff Redfern
Marcia
Spanky Lee
Elmont
Crazy Elmont
Quincy Jones
Frank Sinatra
Clint Eastwood
Baby Doc
Less-than-zero
Havoc
George Bush
Poppy
Evan Mecham
Donald Trump
Skippy Bush
Al Gore
Elvis Presley
M. Dukakis
Mr. Butts
Mr. Jay
Marla Maples
Boopsie's mom
Boopsie's dad
Ray
David Duke
Jimmy
May
Mr. Brewski
Mr. Dum-Dum
Ed Bruer
Robert Kincaid
Lisa
Cathy
Sam Smooth
John
Elaine
John Wayne
H. Reasoner
Harry Reasonless
Bridge Bunch
Roger Mudd
Walter Cronkite
Spiro Agnew
Ed Muskie
Lassie & Timmy
Pat Nixon
Mark Spitz
J. Erlichman
H.R. Haldeman
Sam Ervin
John Dean
Bebe Rebozo
Neil Young
John Denver
Scoop
Erskine
Benjy
Dr. Whoopee
Stephen Weed
Watergators
Ben Bradlee
R. Reagan
Rap Master Ronnie
Amy Carter
Bob Dylan
Diplomats
Castro
Mrs. Hedley
Jimmy Breslin
Jerry Lewis
Dr. Cavendish
Kitty Tracy
Diana Ross
Liz Taylor
Sheriff Evans
Johnny Carson
Ed McMahon
Comrade Zhao
Santa Claus
Ed Meese
James Watt
Tanners A.
Sally Hudson
Andy Rooney
New Jersey Mob
Jane Fonda
R. Donovan
Ray Donovan
Lamaze Class
God
Cassie
R. Vesco
Robert Vesco
Ethiopians
Tinkerbell
Superfly
Endicott
Patty Reagan
Nicaraguans
Sandinistas
Pat Buchanan
Oral Roberts
Hunk-Ra
Nefertiti
Gary Hart
Fawn Hall
John Gotti
Sam Nunn
Skull & Bones
Roger Rabbit
Satan
Alex
R. J. Reynolds
Harvey Foote
Author's Guild
Disney
Snow White
Hugh Hefner
Keating Five
Ivana
Russians
The Kinks
The Doors
Rolling Stones
Neil Bush
Bart Simpson
Baby Butts
Club Scud
B. Kimberlin
Job Seekers
Lily Tomlin
Kirk Douglas
M. Milken
Michael Milken
B'vis & bthead
Beavis and Butthead
Ivan Boesky
The Beatles
Tobacco Lords
R. Limbaugh
Rush Limbaugh
Oprah
Boopsie
Mike Doonesbury
President King
Phil
Daisy Doonesbury
Zonker
Zonker Harris
Nichole
Nguyen Van Phred
Joanie Caucus
Clyde
Paul Revere
Honey
Ching Huan
Jenny Thudpucker
Dan Asher
Ted Kennedy
Edward Kennedy
Zeke Brenner
Joan Caucus, Jr.
Gay Talese
Jeremy Cavendish
Marcia Feinbloom
Trip Tripler
Baby Doc Duvalier
Michael Dukakis
D. Quayle
Dan Quayle
Mrs. Boopstein
Mr. Boopstein
Ray Hightower
Meg
B. Clinton
Bill Clinton
The Huddle
G. Steinem
Gloria Steinem
Walter
G. Wallace
George Wallace
Mickey Mouse
Mickey
Z.'s ducks
Zonker's ducks
Jenny
R. Ziegler
Ronad Ziegler
John Erlichman
H. R. Haldeman
D. Halberstam
David Halberstam
M. Griffin
Merv Griffin
A. Cox
Archibald Cox
A. Haig
Al Haig
John W. Dean III
L. Brezhnev
Leonid Brezhnev
D. Segretti
Donald Segretti
C. MacGregor
Clark MacGregor
M. Mansfield
Mike Mansfield
L. Jaworski
Leon Jaworski
P. Rodino
Peter Rodino
J. Mitchell
John Mitchell
G. Ford
Gerald Ford
E. Richardson
Elliott Richardson
G. Knight & Pip
Gladys Knight
B. Woodward
Bob Woodward
N. Rockefeller
Nelson Rockefeller
Mort
G. Rivera
Geraldo Rivera
J. Brown
Jerry Brown
Benjy Doonesbury
J. Kilpatrick
Jack Kilpatric
Ronald Reagan
J. Carter
Jimmy Carter
L. Carter
Lillian Carter
D. Cheney
Dick Cheney
B. Walters
Barbara Walters
Brenda
H. Jordan
Hamilton Jordan
Z. Brzezinski
Zbigniew Brzezinski
Fidel Castro
M. Begin
Menachim Begin
L. Wasserman
Lew Wasserman
J. Savitch
Jessica Savitch
D. Brinkley
David Brinkley
Ed Koch
Edward Koch
Boss
Elizabeth Taylor
J. Warner
John Warner
P. Donohue
Phil Donohue
J. Swaggart
Jimmy Swaggart
P. George
Phyllis George
McNiel's
Ray & Ellen McNiel
g. Hamilton
George Hamilton
B. Meshak
Babrak Meshak
B. Carter
Billy Carter
G. Will
George Will
N. Reagan
Nancy Reagan
R. Carter
Rosalynn Carter
James Brady
J. Kirkpatrick
Jeane Kirkpatrick
Tanners Anonymous
Muffy
Muffy Brandon
W. Mondale
Walter Mondale
D. Stockman
David Stockman
L. Garment
Leonard Garment
M. Laird
Melvin Laird
A. Gorsuch
Anne Gorsuch
S. Thurmond
Strom Thurmond
Y. Arafat
Yassir Arafat
M. Deaver
Mike Deaver
Voudoun
B. Jeffries
Barney Jeffries
Qunicy Jones
Made Guys
D. Regan
Donald Regan
R. Leach
Robin Leach
E. Bedlow
Ernie Bedlow
Babs Cryer
Lords-R-Us
Contras
R. Headrest
Ron Headrest
G. Schultz
George Schultz
J. Hahn
Jessica Hahn
L. Atwater
Lee Atwater
Whoopee, Inc.
Newsteam
Ivana Trump
The Rolling Stones
Beach Boys
N. Schwartzkopf
Norman Schwartzkopf
P. Jennings
Peter Jennings
J. Sununu
John Sununu
B. Manilow
Barry Manilow
B. Streisand
Barbra Streisand
A. Wright
Angela Wright
Boopshepsut
Brezhnev
Jack Kemp
Zoe Baird
D. Gergen
David Gergen
S. Stone
Sharon Stone
D. Rostenkowski
Dan Rostenkowski
Guns 'n Roses
D. Myers
Dee Dee Myers
B. Dole
Bob Dole
L. Panetta
Leon Panetta
A. Huffington
Ariana Huffington
N. Gingrich
Newt Gingrich
Newtoids
Earl
Jennifer
Phil Gramm
Sal Putrid
B.D.
BD
Lacey
Oliver North
O. North
Senator Sam
Mark Slackmeyer